“Why do the Good Die Young?”

The Mom of one of my teenage patients comes into the office and says, “Cody, things aren’t good. The cancer is back again. The doctors are saying Jen has months to live and she wants to talk to you about dying.” Jen has continued to live longer than any of her physicians expected. She even flew home last July from experimental cancer treatment to attend my wedding to Bruce (the first wedding she has ever attended).

“How do I die?”Jen asked? “I’m mad. I’ve been reading the Bible and I’m tired of reading about Jesus doing all these miracles
for all these people. I want to get married. I want to be a Mother. I don’t want to die. I’m not ready to leave this earth…mostly I don’t want to leave my Mom. Is that weird that my Mom is my everything? And when I die, would you do the service?”

I was quiet. Jen’s first question was so audacious and bold. How many of us have asked this question? I love this girl! She has taught me so much about living courageously. Jen smiles even when she’s in pain and she’s also honest about her hurt and disappointment. I’m not sure if she really understands the impact she’s had on me and countless others.

I finally spoke. “Jen, no one wants to know the ‘why’ of all this more than you. I look at you and think, God, why don’t I have
cancer? Why does Jen have to carry all the pain and suffering? I’m sure your Mom thinks that every day. Jen, I don’t get it. I
couldn’t be a chaplain if I didn’t believe God has prepared a better place than this earth. “There shall be no more death, no more sorrow, nor tears. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away. Behold, I make all things new!” (Revelation 21:4-5) Do you remember hearing that verse at my wedding?

You must feel a degree of powerlessness as the cancer is taking over your body. I looked in her eyes and said, “Jen, you have the ability now to leave your unique legacy on this earth. You’ve earned the right to speak and people do listen. What if people don’t wait until tomorrow to make good choices today? Jen, you’re asking me how to die and you’re teaching me how to live!” Jen smiled and said so softly I could barely hear her, “Cody, when I die, I want you to say that verse at my service.”

We prepare for school, for marriage, for children. What if we prepared to die? Perhaps the answer is the key to the life we want to live. And rather than asking “Why Do the Good Die Young?” it seems rather fitting to ask, “Why Do the Young Die Well?

I rely on prayer& financial gifts from people like you. If you are interested in supporting my call to compassion at Oregon Health & Sciences University and Doernbecher Children’s Hospital, please send your tax- deductible check payable to:

HEALTHCARE CHAPLAINS MINISTRY ASSOCIATION (466)
377 E. CHAPMAN AVE.
PLACENTIA, CA 92870

Bless and be a blessing!